Can women really have it all?
It’s the age old question, and something that is never easily portrayed in the public eye. I guess the question can only be answered when we really understand what “having it all” means to us.
For every single person this concept is completely different. As kids we formulate an idea of what we want our future to look like. It might be a great job, a family, a house with a white picket fence with a dog sitting out the front, or even to live in a campervan travelling around the country, or the world for that matter. Some will simply say that having it all is to be healthy and happy.
If you had asked my younger self where I saw myself by the time I was 30, my answer would have been to be running a magazine, happily married, with 3 children, a house, a dog and a Jeep Wrangler, having travelled all around the world. As that number got closer and closer, I had ticked off a good amount of those things and plenty I hadn’t, but I was happy where life had taken me regardless.
Now excuse me for stereotyping, but I am yet to meet a woman that works in a senior management position in a corporate environment who isn’t either a undiagnosed psychopath or a total See You Next Tuesday. (I am more than happy to be proven wrong and would encourage you to reach out and let me know otherwise!)
What happens to those women we look up to and want to mentor us in between being one of us and becoming one of them? It isn’t a question I have the answer to but to any of them reading this, plain and simple - Thank You For Nothing and Goodbye Forever!
“The women who have managed to be both mothers and top professionals are superhuman, rich, or self-employed.”
I must have misplaced that cape I was suppose to get when I became a mum, I am guessing wherever I left it is also filled with all that money I supposedly have - right?!
No matter what side of the camp you live on you will be questioned. Stay at home mum - what do you all day? Working mum - so you pay someone else to raise your child?
Is it so much to ask that women can be given the freedom to support their children, watch their sports days and award ceremonies and be there to pick them up or drop them off each day WHILE ALSO working a senior management position, and still kick arse at what they do?
Why does it have to be one or the other?
Currently for me this isn’t a question of equality but a question of why do we not choose the right people for the right jobs? After returning to work from short 6-month maternity leave I was told by my workplace that they “didn’t have room for part-time employees.”
Now don’t get me wrong, the place was growing rapidly and a job that once consumed my mind pretty much 24/7 was now having to compete with the amazing bundle of laughs and love that was waiting for me at the end of the day, so I understood their point of view.
The scary part began after this when searching for a new job. Potential employers didn’t know that I was a worker who would give it all no matter what, someone who would start early, and stay back when needed, or work from home, and someone that genuinely wanted to return to the workforce.
I was ready to sink my teeth into a job that I was extremely qualified for, good at, that I knew I could get amazing results for clients and my employer if I was GIVEN THE CHANCE.
This chance came in the form of a job within walking distance from my house and with some amazing people I had met through my industry in years gone by. The only catch? A MASSIVE pay cut and a few steps backwards just to get my foot back in the career sliding door. I guess the joke was on me for taking the job but it then led me to finding the YDY Crew, so I have to admit I am pretty stoked with how it all turned out.
Isn't hindsight a wonderful thing?
Now going back to that quote above about women having it all... the only other option I had left to ensure my plan of “having it all” came true meant that becoming self employed was all the remained. Lucky I found two other stewpid fools that wanted the exact same thing out of life!
YDY is currently our side hustle - our little baby that we adore watching grow and flourish. One day it will be our main hustle, which we can’t wait for!
Until then we ARE doing it all - we work full time, run households and families, manage our relationships, our health and our lives - and do all the things that come with that.
In the mean time employers need to stop taking the piss and pay us what we deserve, for the job we can do and are qualified to do. It shouldn’t matter if the job takes us 9 hours or we can do it in 4, as long as you are getting the results you want.
We may not "have it ALL" right now but we do have all that we NEED (minus a few extra zeros on the end of our paycheque!)
KARMA! We are waiting patiently and look forward to you showing up with good things sometime soon, bitch!
Until then See You Next Tuesday!